Becoming a participating member of the group means that people get to know you and vice versa.You have an opportunity to establish yourself as a cool, fun person to get to know instead of that douchebag who’s clearly here to try to get laid.This is one of the reasons why randomly messaging people on Facebook is a loser’s game: it completely ignores the social context of the network.It’s the equivalent of getting somebody’s number from a friend of a friend and sending them texts out of the blue – it’s unsettling at best, even if you have nothing but the purest of intentions.Now, I realize that some of you may be wondering: if I’m such a big advocate of meeting women through non-traditional groups, why am I telling you to benefits to taking a measured approach.Simply joining and participating gives you a better chance to make new friends, increase your social circle and build an attractive lifestyle.Most PUA schools teach various forms of “Day Game” – that is, meeting women out during the day, rather than at night in bars – and nine times out of ten, the only difference between the Day Game and Night Game approaches is the choice of venue.In fact, some of the techniques for “day game” are even Similarly, guys who treat an activity club or a convention or Meet Up group as their own sexual salad bar end up creeping out and alienating women and ultimately chasing them out of the group entirely.
But while there To start with, guys who just show up and immediately start hitting on people make women uncomfortable.
At, say, an anime club or a Meet Up for people who love stand-up paddle-boarding, there is , not finding someone to come test the durability of your mattress springs that night.
The expected and appropriate behavior is entirely different.
A guy who rolls up on somebody at a tabletop gaming event at the local coffee shop the same way he would at a nightclub is displaying incredibly poor social calibration; his behavior simply isn’t appropriate for the social context of the situation and it’s going to make women justifiably uncomfortable.
He’s demonstrating low social intelligence – that either he doesn’t know the right way to behave or boundaries as well.